The following is chapter one from a book I wrote in 1984.\u00a0 It is part of a trilogy.\u00a0 The publishing houses refused it back then.\u00a0 After wall-papering my office with rejection slips (it was a small office) I packed it up, tucked it away and forgot about it.\u00a0 A recent decluttering brought it to light again and\u00a0I’m thinking of producing it as an eBook.\u00a0\u00a0 I have always considered fiction to be my weak suit. \u00a0Please read this sample chapter and give me your opinion as to whether or not this book has potential to sell.\u00a0 This is a Sci-Fi book, if you hate Sci-Fi, you are excused, thank you for coming, I hope to see you next time.\u00a0 To the rest of you, if you saw this as a sample of the book, would you find it compelling enough to buy the book?<\/p>\n
Thank you for your input, feel free to be honest, that is what I am asking for.<\/p>\n
Revised per suggestions: 4\/15<\/p>\n
\u00a0By:\u00a0 Allan Douglas<\/p>\n
\u00a0Chapter 1: Planetfall<\/span><\/strong><\/p>\n Garthaak throttles back to reduce speed as their ship feels the first tugs of atmosphere.\u00a0 This will be an unconventional, and dangerous, approach; dropping rapidly\u00a0through the atmosphere to minimize the chance of detection, then hugging the surface as they make their way to an unauthorized port of entry.\u00a0 It must all be done as quickly as possible; in and out, fast and clean.\u00a0 He points the nose of their small ship directly at the planet and calculates the speed to keep the ship just to the safe side of incineration.<\/p>\n Koni scans her board, looking for signs of trouble.\u00a0 She and her three crewmates had made many runs in the modified little starship. Rough atmosphere, heavy loads and fate tended to fry circuits and ancient components. Koni stays busy keeping their ship operational anytime they enter an atmosphere. But she enjoys the challenge.<\/p>\n The sky changes from black to blue-green.\u00a0 Wispy white clouds\u00ad rip past the forward window.\u00a0 The green smear of landscape resolves into a nubbly\u00ad multi-hued fuzz.\u00a0 \u00adThe surface below grows more distinct as they descend; a river meanders across the scene like brown yarn on a green\u00ad rug and grows larger as the emerald sphere resolves into a lush tropical planet; fuzz turns to nubble,\u00ad patches of color sharpening against the backdrop of jungle.\u00a0 A few small lakes \u00adbecome visible as the surface rushes dizzyingly up at them.<\/p>\n Just when it seems \u00adthat the little craft would surely auger into the jungle landscape, Garthaak \u00adpulls the ship’s nose up, opening the throttles and pushing the suspensor \u00adgenerators to full power. \u00a0Engines roar to life, thrumming through every fiber and bolt.\u00a0 The ship \u00adshudders violently as the stumpy suspensor wings claw at the air and shove against gravity.\u00a0 A multitude of \u00aditems rattle and clank inside lockers.\u00a0 Massive branches reach upwards, \u00adready to snare the vessel.\u00a0 The tiny freighter ends its headlong descent and \u00adwallows downward through its suspensor field, nose angled up, generators \u00adscreaming as they fervently try to repel the fast rising ground.\u00a0 Garthaak gradually eases back on the suspensors and levels out.\u00a0 The \u00adcraft shoots forward, riding on its suspensor field, just above the treetops.<\/p>\n Koni unclenches her fists, allowing the blood back into her fingers.\u00a0 All\u00ad but Garthaak share a common sigh.\u00a0 He merely tosses a smug look over his \u00adshoulder at the others as he keeps the ship skimming along at a very high speed, \u00adthe jungle a green blur as it passes close below them.\u00a0 The ship rolls side to side as Garthaak winds his way through the taller trees in order to stay glued to the jungle canopy.<\/p>\n “There.”\u00a0 Fothaak’s bony hand curls in on itself, leaving a single \u00adknobby brown digit pointing toward a smudge on the horizon, “That must be the \u00admountain range.”<\/p>\n “Yes.”\u00a0 Garthaak agrees, “And we must not give ourselves away by going \u00adover it.\u00a0 There is a pass somewhere; the only way through.”<\/p>\n Fothaak compares the shape of the mountains rising before them to those \u00adrepresented on the chart, “There it is.\u201d he states, waving vaguely at the window.\u00a0 Garthaak swings the ships nose over a bit.\u00a0 \u201cNo, the other way you fool!\u00a0 The pass is right there<\/em>, I’m sure of it.”<\/p>\n “Fool?!\u00a0 I am your captain.\u00a0 You will address me as such!”<\/p>\n “Hah!\u00a0 When you’ve earned my respect you shall have it.”<\/p>\n \u201cBoys, boys;\u201d interjects Koni from her station behind Fothaak, \u201cwe have no time for sparring, let’s just get this done, shall we?\u201d<\/p>\n Gornoth shot her a disappointed look from across the aisle.\u00a0 Being Calamarian her three shipmates love a spirited argument.\u00a0 Being the only non-Calamarian aboard sometimes forces her to be the voice of reason.<\/p>\n “You had better be right about that pass, Fothaak.”\u00a0 Growls Gornoth, seated on the lounge at the engineer\u2019s station behind Garthaak, “Or we are going to\u00ad disappoint our clients by burrowing their shipment into the side of a \u00admountain!”<\/p>\n Suddenly a small aircraft bursts up through the foliage ahead of them and fires several rockets at the lighter.\u00a0 Their ship jolts as one of them strikes.<\/p>\n Buzzers sound, bells ring and a myriad of small lights begin flashing on\u00ad the command cabin’s console panels.\u00a0 Koni’s dainty fingers fly over her\u00ad keyboard, isolating the damaged circuits and routing power through usable ones. \u00adShe barely notices as Fothaak and Gornoth back off of their lounges and bolt through the cockpit door to \u00adtake up posts in the engine room.<\/p>\n Garthaak dodges the oncoming menace and shoves the throttles forward.\u00a0 He tests even Koni’s faith in his skill as he skims the tree tops at this \u00adextreme speed.\u00a0 She gasps as he swerves around the occasional taller tree, dodging missiles hurled at them by the aircraft.\u00a0 The G forces are no longer compensated for by their artificial gravity.<\/p>\n Her work done, Koni clings to the arms of her lounge as she watches the mountains rise higher above the jungle.\u00a0 She unconsciously clenches her teeth, hoping they can out run the fighter, hoping the pass will be where \u00adFothaak said it is and unobstructed, hoping the fighter pilot was not \u00adcalling more of his kind into the chase, hoping the ship would hold up \u00adunder the strain, hoping…<\/p>\n The mountains loom above them now.\u00a0 Her view is obstructed by Fothaak\u2019s lounge and Garthaak\u2019s bulky form.\u00a0 Garthaak reduces speed and guides the lighter into the long, \u00adtwisting mountain pass that appears suddenly before them.\u00a0 His faith in Fothaak\u2019s abilities belie the impression he\u2019d created earlier.<\/p>\n Their instruments show \u00adthat the fighter was far behind but still in pursuit.<\/p>\n Watching the gyrating mountains through the front window as the lighter \u00adrolled through the turns makes Koni queasy.\u00a0 She turns her attention to the \u00adtactical scope in an attempt to pacify her stomach.<\/p>\n She sees that the nimble fighter is negotiating the pass much faster than \u00adthey could and closing rapidly, though the pilot seems less skilled than\u00ad Garthaak. Being a winged aircraft, it should have been able to make much crisper \u00adturns than it was.\u00a0 Again and again it sloughs through a turn without banking\u00ad enough, coming dangerously close to the rocky walls of the pass.<\/p>\n “Ha haaa!”\u00a0 Shouts Garthaak as the lighter wallows through the final\u00ad curve and accelerates into open air.\u00a0 The fighter comes into the bend right \u00adbehind them, fires several missiles then disappears from the screen, crashing into a rocky outcropping at the mouth of the pass.<\/p>\n In the distance ahead Koni sees a sheer sided, bone white mountain standing \u00adlike a lone green-helmeted sentinel over the entire valley.\u00a0 The ship stumbles \u00adas the fighter’s final salvo seeks them out and makes contact.<\/p>\n The thundering roar of major components exploding pushes Koni’s heart into \u00adher throat.\u00a0 She fights with panic as a screech like that of bad chalk on a\u00ad blackboard fills the ship and it rolls sideways, smashing into the trees.<\/p>\n The last thing Koni sees is Garthaak slapping the suspensor field controls \u00adto maximum and fighting with the ship’s guidance system even as the ship’s nose\u00ad slams into the Equarian soil<\/p>\n * * * * *<\/p>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" The following is chapter one from a book I wrote in 1984. It is part of a trilogy. The publishing houses refused it back then. After wall-papering my office with rejection slips (it was a small office) I packed it up, tucked it away and forgot about it. A recent decluttering brought it to light … Continue reading “Sci-Fi Sample: Tale of the Draggon”<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[44],"tags":[84,13,29],"class_list":["post-1847","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-creative","tag-samples","tag-scifi","tag-writing"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1847","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1847"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1847\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21483,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1847\/revisions\/21483"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1847"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1847"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/pineymountainfoster.org\/thoughts\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1847"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}