Tag: humor

On the morning of Sunday August 3rd Nellie Notebook, faithful repository of family photos and documents and processor of all personal e-mail and internet browsing for Doug & Marie Bittinger and formerly the administrator of all bookkeeping and records keeping functions for Treasures Of Appalachia Inc., passed away.

Mr. Bittinger arrived at Nellie’s usual location in the Bittinger home dining room at 5:17 am to awaken her so they could get started on the day’s duties, but as she awoke Nellie suffered congestive hard drive failure which in turn caused her entire Operating System to fail.

C.P.R. (Control Programming Restoration) was attempted but was unsuccessful.  Life Support systems (i.e booting from the LAN) was set up but that too was unsuccessful.

Nellie is survived by her half-brother Dale Desktop who has been employed as the Bittinger family’s business computer and a new baby sister: Ipod.

Dale has agreed to step in and provide family e-mail services to keep communications open in Nellie’s absence.  A replacement for Nellie is not in the foreseeable future.

Internment is planned for Saturday morning at dawn.  The family requests that in lieu of flowers, please send dark chocolate.

Today I spent three hours doing the spring maintenance on my riding mower: oil change, grease job, cleaning out the debris, checking filters, tires, etc.  All went well until I got to greasing the front wheel bearings.

I took the dust cover off of the first hub: no grease zerk.  That’s odd.  The manual did say not to oil or grease anything that uses a new UHMW plastic bushing.  I didn’t SEE plastic bushings, but without dismantling the front wheels I wouldn’t.  Still, no grease port: can’t grease it.  Move on.  Read more:

Recently a video of a flight attendant’s humorous safety lecture has been making the rounds of social media and she even appeared on a morning talk show.  But she is not a pioneer in this realm.

Kulula Airlines is a low cost airline with its head office situated in Johannesburg.

Kulula airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight “safety lecture” and announcements a bit more entertaining than most. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported:

On Kulula flights there is no assigned seating: you just sit where you want.  On one flight passengers were apparently having a hard time choosing, when a flight attendant announced, “People, people we’re not picking out furniture here, find a seat and get in it!”

—o0o—

On another flight with a very “senior” flight attendant crew, the pilot said, “Ladies and gentlemen, we’ve reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants.”    Continue reading “Flights of Humor”