Prattlings – Page 3 – Random Thoughts

Chance Encounter

An odd thing happened today. Marie and I were at the Friends Animal Shelter in Newport to assess a dog they have there. While that is not a common occurrence, that is not the odd thing. After we assessed the dog we were standing outside talking to a staffer. I noticed an Audi pull up to the front gate of the facility, which was closed. A woman got out of the car, slipped through the gap in the gate and approached the front of the building, disappearing from my sight. Audi’s are not common here, but someone entering this way is not in itself odd, we came through the closed gate as well. So I paid it no mind: must be someone the staff knows.

A few moments later Carol, the facilities vet tech and person in charge that day, led the woman around the corner toward us. The woman said, “Oh, are you Doug Bittinger?” but she said my name in a manner that caused me much confusion. She said it as though it meant something: someone of importance that she was excited to meet. What unfolded over the next few minutes was astounding.

A man joined us and it turned out these were Marcie and Bob D., who had adopted a dog named Drake almost 5 years ago (Oct 2014). We had fostered Drake. But, they adopted him from Eleventh Hour Rescue in New Jersey. What were they doing here in Newport TN? That’s the astounding part.

They have since moved from their apartment in New Jersey to an acreage in Kentucky and were on their way to Asheville today. As they drove, they saw a sign indicating that Newport was ahead and Marcie said, “I’m sure Newport is where Eli is from (Drake is now named Eli, after their son’s favorite football player), let’s see if we can find that shelter.” So they pulled off the interstate and poked around until they found what was, 5 years ago, known as the Newport Animal Shelter. And they just happened to arrive during the one moment of eternity that Marie and I also happened to be there.

I am not a statistician, but I’m pretty sure the odds of something like this just happening is astronomical!

We remember Drake because he was a particularly bright, well behaved dog, and because he was one of the few dogs who was adopted the same day he arrived at the facility Steele Away Home – Canine Foster and Rescue sent him to. Marcie has kept in touch over the years by sending occasional photos and updates (something we really appreciate, by the way). They gave us the story behind his rapid adoption and caught us up on their lives and the ways Eli has enriched it. It was wonderful meeting them in person and hearing all about Eli’s new life in the country.

But I’m still marveling at the way our paths crossed, from such distances, at that one place, in that one moment, to form that experience. God does work in mysterious ways!

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Canine Street Gangs

Yesterday evening I heard what sounded like a small pack of coyotes moving through the area, yapping and cutting up like a canine street gang making their presence known and threatening to hurt anyone who got in their way.

When I let my dogs out for their bed time potty run I made sure all the floodlights were on and I went out with them carrying a strong flashlight. I hoped that lights and a human presence would be enough deterrent if, indeed, one or more coyotes were in the immediate area. My yard is fenced, but most fences mean little to coyotes.

Later, as I was sitting in bed reading, I heard a single blast of what sounded like a shot gun. Very near by. Then it got real quiet. I was cautious again this morning, but it sounded like that pack of punks learned a little respect for humanity.

Is This Even Possible?

Is it possible that coyotes are in our area? We’ve not had them before.

Oh yes! I know people who have personally told me of their own encounters with coyotes. These people live along O’Neil Road: just to the north west of us, and in Bridgeport: just to the north east of us. My neighbor says he saw one walking up our driveway towards the woods one morning a while back. So, yes: this is a real threat and a grave concern to me.

Dealing With Coyotes

According to the Tennessee Wildlife Resources Agency, this is how to deal with coyotes:

Do not feed coyotes!! When coyotes begin associating humans with food they loose their natural fears and may become dangerous.
Eliminate water sources. These areas attract rodents, birds, and snakes which the coyote will prey upon.
Position bird feeders so coyotes can not get to the feed. Coyotes may also be attracted to birds and small mammals that have been lured in by the feeder.
Do not discard edible garbage. Coyotes are opportunistic and will eat any table scraps.
Secure garbage containers. Use trash barrels with lids that clamp down tight even when tipped over.
Do not place trash cans out the night before scheduled pick-up. Placing cans out in the morning before pick-up will give coyotes less time to scavenge. They will not have cover of darkness.
Do not leave barbecue grill outside and uncovered. The smell of the grill and the contents of the grills drip pan attracts coyotes.
Feed pets indoors whenever possible. Remove any leftovers if feeding outdoors. Store pet food in areas not accessible to other animals.
Clear brush and weeds from around property. This deprives the coyote’s prey (small mammals and birds) of protective cover and deters coyote from hunting around your property.
A fenced yard may deter coyotes. The fence must be at least 6 feet high. Preferably the bottom of the fence should extend 6 inches below ground level.
Do not leave small children outside alone if coyotes have been frequenting the area.
Do not allow pets to run free. Provide secure housing especially at night. Small pets (cats, rabbits, small dogs) are favorite prey of coyotes.
Discourage coyotes from frequenting your area. Harass them by throwing rocks, shouting, and making loud noises when one is seen. [shotguns work too!]
Learn more here: Coyote Control

Boggled by Language Abuse

Being a writer, I take language: the meanings and flow of words, seriously. Words have power and precise meanings. Effective communication means using words properly. Throwing together a mish-mash of terms or making words up by splicing improper suffixes onto a good word breeds confusion. Even newscasters are trying to sound hyper-intelligent by tossing out big words spliced together using parts of two legitimate words.

But common terms are abused as well. Just now I was asked if my truck runs on diesel gasoline. This was not an either-or question, it was a yes-no question. Diesel fuel and gasoline are two different things. Using them together caused a train crash in the switch yard of my brain and boggled me for a moment.

An acquaintance often used the word “empowerized”, a melding of empowered and energized to convey vitality and excitement. But it sent a little shiver up my neck every time I heard it.

A few other language laughables I can think of include:

I’ll go convertsate with him
I’m so flustrated!
That’s supposably a great new product.
A CEO philanthropist was referred to as a philanthropreneur by a news anchor.
Sorry, I’m not sure where I am. I need to get orientated.

I could go on, but you get the idea. And this doesn’t even get into words like irregardless. Regardless means without regard. Sticking the “ir” on the front makes it mean “not without regard” which is the opposite of what they’re trying to say. There are SO many of these in common use today that I could go on all day. But I’ll spare you that.

Now to be fair, the English language that we have today was made up by sticking bits of words from many other languages together. And it evolves as each generation rises up and squishes it into their own mold of preferred expression. So I may have no right at all to complain about younger people making up or twisting words into new meanings. Maybe I’m just getting old and cranky. Maybe I should just suckupicate and deal with it.

If…

This poem by Rudyard Kipling was what the pastor at the church we attended this morning opened with. I’ve heard the first part re-done many ways, but I’d forgotten what an excellent poem it is. Enjoy!

If…

by Rudyard Kipling

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise: Continue reading “If…”

Cochise vs the Dump Truck

Today we had some driveway work done. The driveway up to my workshop is a MESS! All washed out and badly rutted. I bent a rim on Marie’s Subaru by taking it up this driveway. It’s time to dig deep and get repairs done or it will just keep getting worse.

Cochise insisted on going out to chase the tractor and the dump truck and hurl heinous threats at everyone. He stayed on his side of the fencing, they stayed on theirs. He got so worked up early on that he leapt up against the fencing, bounced back, and did a back flip!

After a half hour of these intense aerobics, I went out with a lead to bring him back to the house. He offered no resistance at all. His tongue was hanging so low he was tripping on it!

We got half way up the hill to the house and he just flopped over on his side and panted, “I can’t go any farther, carry me!” Continue reading “Cochise vs the Dump Truck”

Grace and Marcie On Your Tail

There was a woman who had a son named Timmy. When Timmy was in kindergarten she would walk him to school, a few blocks away.

Halfway through the year Timmy said, “You don’t need to walk me to the door, Mom, I’m a big boy now. You wait here on the sidewalk and I’ll go up on my own.” So she’d wait on the sidewalk and watch till her son got inside.

The following year her son said, “Mom, when I start first grade, I want to walk to school on my own. I’m a big boy now, you don’t need to walk me to school.” She agreed, but was worried about leaving him on his own so young.

She had a friend who lived two doors down who was going to be walking her daughter to Kindergarten that year and the woman asked her friend if they would time their walks to and from school to allow Timmy to get out front by a half block or so and just sort of keep an eye on him without letting him know they were keeping an eye on him. Her friend said she would. Continue reading “Grace and Marcie On Your Tail”

The Power of the Dark Roast

I got up this cold, cold morning and found that while we still had water flowing, the internet was not. So I went over to my workshop intending to take a hair dryer to the router, melt the blockage, and get the electron flow moving again. But it turned out that there was nothing wrong with modem or router: our LAN is working perfectly, it’s just that my laptop does not feel like being conversational this morning.

So I settled into my chair, set my mug of hot, black coffee in its place next to the laptop and began working on a local writing task. The scent of this invigorating elixir was, apparently, enough to change the laptop’s mind, for after a few moments of typing, it went “bing!” alerting me that new e-mail had arrived.

Coffee is great stuff, isn’t it?

The Rolling Browns

Despite being right next to TVA, the nation’s largest government owned supplier of electricity, our region has been experiencing rolling brown-outs and even power losses because of the cold in areas where too many people are using too much power all at once. Primarily this effects that “everyone is getting ready for work” time slot. The power utilities have asked us (us as in everyone, not just Marie and I) to be mindful of our power consumption between 6:00 am and 9:00 am until we get through this extra-cold spell.

We (Marie and I, this time) are doing our part: Continue reading “The Rolling Browns”

Zen Sarcasm

I did not originate these, but I’ve collected them from various locations on the World Wide Web as I’ve encountered them. Enjoy!

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
It’s always darkest before dawn. So if you’re going to steal your neighbor’s newspaper, that’s the time to do it.
Don’t be irreplaceable. If you can’t be replaced, you can’t be promoted.
Always remember that you’re unique: just like everyone else.
Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
If you think nobody cares if you’re alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you’re a mile away and you have their shoes.
If at first you don’t succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.
If you always tell the truth, you don’t have to remember anything.
Some days you’re the bug; some days you’re the windshield.
Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
A closed mouth gathers no foot.
Duct tape is like ‘The Force’. It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
Generally speaking, you aren’t learning much when your lips are moving.
Experience is something you don’t get until just after you need it.
Never miss a good opportunity to shut up.

The Importanceof Word Order

There is a meme going around that illustrates the power of word placement very well: place the word “only” anywhere in the sentence and see how the meaning changes, yet it remains a proper sentence. I won’t go through all of them, but let’s look at a few.

Only she told him that she loved him.
No one but her has told him of their love.

She only told him that she loved him.
Her profession of love for him was not sincere.

She told only him that she loved him.
She admitted her feelings to him but no one else.

Go ahead and work the rest out in your head and you’ll see that this sentence has many diverse meanings depending on where you place “only”.

And then there is this “rule” for descriptive words put out by the BBC: Continue reading “The Importanceof Word Order”