Random Thoughts – Page 25 – The ramblings of an addled mind.

Are We There Yet?

We often make light of youngsters’ exasperated query from the back seat of a car that’s been on the road longer than they’d like. And we can sometimes empathize with them when we wait longer than we anticipated for some event or milestone in life. But we need to recognize that these markers are just that, markers – perhaps rest stops – along the highway of life. The real question we need to be asking is, “Where are we going?”

If we have no destination in mind when we set out on our journey, how can we ever arrive? Would we then not be simply driving endlessly from one rest stop to the next – never really accomplishing anything except using up the resources of our life?

But how do we choose a destination? Continue reading “Are We There Yet?”

Steampunk War of the Worlds Video

Anyone who knows me knows that I like classic Sci-fi, and that I dabble around with video. In my case the video is all very basic stuff and nearly all is centered around promoting our foster dogs so they have a better chance of finding a forever home.

Today I came across this video. Using World War I archival footage, some CGI, and reenactment footage, this short film shows what a Martian War of the Worlds would have looked like in 1914. It’s very well done.

Great martian war from PLAZMA on Vimeo.

I have several versions of The War of the Worlds on DVD:

The original Paramount version set in the 1950s with the manta shaped flying machines and staring Gene Barry. Having read the book many times this version and it’s flying machines was a disappointment.
The modern version staring Tom Cruise. Better but still not very faithful to the book.
A 2005 Pendragon version set at the turn of the century (19th-20th) and staring Anthony Piana which uses jerky, stop action photography for the martian walking machines. The movie is long (180 minutes) and the acting is not the best, but I feel this one is most faithful to H.G Wells’s original manuscript.

Because I am such a fan of this book and the various movie take-offs, I very much enjoyed PLAZMA’s steampunk version, even though it’s just a few minutes long I hope you will too. If you do, the project has a web site at The Great Martian War, where more video clips and lots of photographs as well as info about the (fake) documentary they are working on are available. (NOTE: this web page was hosted by The History Channel and has since been taken down. I can find no replacement “home” for them.

Pickled Sandwich Peppers

My pepper plants are doing very well this year. Last year they were disappointing, but they like the conditions we’ve had this year – and maybe the composted chicken poo I mixed into the soil helps. Marie and I like jalapenos and use them in cooking a variety of dishes. Banana pepper rings are great as sandwich peppers and can be used in soups, casseroles and stews. I’m about to put up a batch of peppers for use through the winter and next spring. Want to watch?

Peppers can be preserved by freezing, dehydrating or canning. If canned, they can be pickled and water-bathed, or pressure canned in water. I’m going to can these. Pressure canning means cooking them at a high temperature for a longer time, and results in a mushier end product, so I’ll pickle this batch in a vinegar brine.

If I were going to can them whole or cut them into long strips, I’d blister them first and remove the skins. But putting them up as rings sidesteps the need for that.

What You Need:
• 6 pounds of peppers
• A fist of garlic (only for the banana peppers)
• A sharp knife
• 10 pint jars with lids and bands
• 1 stainless steel or enamelware pot for heating the brine
• A large pot or canner
• A canning tool kit is very helpful, but you can do this without it.

Brine:
• 10 cups white vinegar
• 2 cups water
• 8 teaspoons pickling salt (pickling salt has no iodine added, Kosher salt works too)
• 6 teaspoons Truvia (or 4 tablespoons sugar)

The Process:

Core and slice your peppers into bowls. I’m doing jalapenos and bananas so I keep them separate, but the recipe and processing is the same so they can all be canned in one batch.

Coring a banana pepper is easy: cut through just the pepper flesh all the way around the shoulder but not into the core. Now grab the stem and give it a gentle, rotary wiggle. That will break the webbing, and the core – complete with seeds – will slide right out.

For jalapenos, core them if you want, but keep the seeds to be included with the peppers. A lot of the heat is in the seeds, to keep their heat, include the seeds.

Put your jars into the canner (or large pot), cover with water, and sterilize by boiling for 10 minutes (more if you are above 1,000 feet of elevation). Do the lids too.

In the stock pot combine the vinegar, water, sweetener and salt (note the salt is not a preservative but for flavor enhancement; you may omit it if you want). Heat this mixture just to boiling, then reduce the heat to maintain an easy simmer just to keep it hot.

Remove the jars one at a time with your jar grabber (found in that oh-so-handy canning tool set) and dump the water out of the jar into the sink. Fill the jar with pepper rings. If this jar is banana peppers, put a clove of garlic in the bottom first. Don’t waste your garlic on the jalapenos, you won’t taste it anyway. Go for a “firm fill” of the rings. Too loose and you’ll have little product in the jar and will run short of brine. Too tight and the rings break and become strips. Some people are kind of obsessive about having rings, so don’t mash them in too tight.

Install your jar funnel (tool kit) and ladle in hot brine. You will want 1/2 inch of head space (air space above the liquid) so stop ladling a little short of that. Remove the funnel. Use a thin implement (I use an orange peeler, but anything you have on hand will do) to slide down the sides of the jar to jostle the rings a bit and dislodge any trapped air bubbles. Now top off the brine to achieve the 1/2-inch head space.

Wipe the rim with a clean paper towel or cloth, install a lid and a band and tighten just until finger tight. Guys, this is not the time to display your inhuman strength; just barely snug it up. Put this jar back in the canner and repeat.

If you run a little short on brine, top up that last jar with some straight vinegar.

When they are all filled, turn up the heat under the canner and bring to a boil. Start timing when you have a good rolling boil going. Process for at least 10 minutes: more if you are at a higher elevation. I do mine for 13 minutes. Then turn off the heat and let the canner cool down a bit.

Remove the jars from the water. Be careful not to clank the jars into each other or the canner; they have an unfortunate tendency to explode right now. Be gentle and set them on a tea-towel-protected counter top to cool. Leave plenty of air space between them. Let them cool for a good 30 minutes.

You should hear the lids plinking as the vacuum builds inside the cooling jars and the lids seal. That’s a good thing, it means you have done well.

After the jars have cooled so you can touch them, test all the lids. They should be sucked down tight so they don’t move or make noise when you press on the center of the lid. If it makes a plink-plonk sound when you press and release it, move that jar to the fridge and eat it first (give them two weeks to pickle). Those that sealed can be labeled, moved to your canned foods shelves, and put into long-term storage.

Originally Published by Grit Magazine: 7/29/2015

National Mutt Day

Celebrate National Mutt Day in the USA on July 31 and December 2. This is a fun celebration of mixed breed dogs. Created in 2005 by celebrity pet and family life expert, Colleen Paige, National Mutt Day brings awareness to the plight of mixed breed dogs in shelters around the country and encourages people to adopt shelter dogs rather than buy “designer dogs” from puppy mills.

Did you know that mixed breed dogs: Continue reading “National Mutt Day”

Fighting the Tomato Hornworm With Borage

Found hornworm

For years now I have done battle with the tomato hornworm. You know Hornworm: big, green brute with a spiky horn on his butt. Sort of a cross between a backward rhinoceros and The Hulk. He can get to be 4 inches long and will decimate a tomato plant overnight.

In the past I’ve used a number of methods to try to keep this marauder at bay.

• Sevin Powder: works pretty well but is a chemical insecticide.

• Neem oil: works pretty well and is a natural repellent, but has to be reapplied after every rainfall.

• Hand picking: It is harder than one might think to spot these well-camouflaged beasties. Even as big as they get, they can be hard to see in amongst the leaves. I look mostly for the leaf damage and poo-pellets they leave, then go hunting in that region.

An infested tomato hornworm.

• Braconid Wasp: a natural control in that these iridescent blue wasps lay their eggs on the hornworm and when the eggs hatch, they feed on the form and kill it. When I find a worm packing a load of eggs on its back I move that one to a sacrificial plant where it can live out its life and help proliferate the Braconids. I’ve never been stung by a Braconid despite having them nest in my barn eaves. I consider them good fellows and welcome them.

• Bacillus thuringiensis: a naturally occurring bacterium that attacks the digestive systems of numerous leaf-feeders, including hornworms. It is available in spray or powder form under the trade names of Dipel and Thuricide.

This year I tried a new weapon: Borage. Read More…

The Truth Behind the “Pit Bull”

The dog we commonly refer to as the Pit Bull was developed in England from a cross between the English Bulldog and terriers. The exact terrier breeds used to create this cross is not clearly recorded, but popular opinion points to the White English Terrier, the Black-and-Tan Terrier and the Fox Terrier. The result of these combinations became known as the Staffordshire Bull Terrier and were used to manage cattle and by hunters to help hold wild boar and other game.

As time passed, the breed entered the blood-sport of bull and bear baiting. After these sports were outlawed in England around 1835, dog fighting rings took their place. Dogs were forced to fight one another to the death in hidden arenas called “pits.” The Staffordshire Bull Terrier was highly successful in the fighting ring because of its tenacity, courage, stamina, strength and intelligence. Equally important was its loyal, non-aggressive and responsive nature with people. Fighting dogs were expected to be obedient, trustworthy and easily handled by their owners at all times. Because of their popularity in dog fighting pits the breed became known as “Pit Bulls”.

Continue reading “The Truth Behind the “Pit Bull””

The Sands of Opinion

Knowing when to trust who can be a difficult part of life. This is nothing new; Eve was deceived by the serpent in the Garden of Eden, and that serpent has been spinning lies designed to misguide ever since.

Jesus addressed this issue for His followers in His sermon on the mountain.

Matthew 7:13-20 New International Version (NIV)

13 “Enter through the narrow gate. For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it. 14 But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.

15 “Watch out for false prophets. They come to you in sheep’s clothing, but inwardly they are ferocious wolves. 16 By their fruit you will recognize them. Do people pick grapes from thornbushes, or figs from thistles? 17 Likewise, every good tree bears good fruit, but a bad tree bears bad fruit. 18 A good tree cannot bear bad fruit, and a bad tree cannot bear good fruit. 19 Every tree that does not bear good fruit is cut down and thrown into the fire. 20 Thus, by their fruit you will recognize them.

Here He uses three similes to illustrate His point: a wolf, a road, and a tree. Continue reading “The Sands of Opinion”

Fending Off Garden Pests

If you are like me, there are two main battles that I fight in growing a vegetable garden: weather and pests.

Weather, we cannot do much about. We take our best guess as to when that last frost will sneak in, and have empty containers and straw on hand to use as protection in case we’re wrong. We can water when it’s dry, use raised beds if it’s too wet, have sulfur, milk and Neem oil on hand to ward off blight and fungus. But other than growing in the controlled environment of a greenhouse, we cannot control the weather: we just deal with it.

fence boxes Pests, we have a little more control over. How much control depends on how far we are willing to go. If we’re willing to saturate our food in poisons, we can achieve a high degree of efficiency against insects. I, for one, prefer to avoid poisons that can have a deleterious effect on my family and me. Fortunately, there are other ways.

Here are a few of the things I do in my garden to help ward off insects and other pests. Read More…

THE WAGER

It was hot… so hot that even in a cool-suit I could feel my brain sizzling inside my skull. I reached the top of a pile of rocks and stood as tall as I could to scan the horizon before starting down again. Nothing. Just the shimmering air – what little of that there was – and big, sharp rocks with traces of cinnamon-colored sand between them.

“I’m not going to make it.” I sighed, “It’s going to take me four or five hours just to reach the horizon, and I don’t see Transtellar’s dome at all. Not a sign of it. And worst of all: now I’m talking to my self!” I was lost. I was going to die. This didn’t surprise me much, since I knew the risks before I started out, but it was a disappointment; I really thought I could do it.

“Come too far to turn back, have to keep trying…”

I began my descent, my feet heavy, legs weak, vision blurred. Suddenly the rocky ground rushed up at me and everything went bright red, then faded to black.

~/ *_* \~

When I came around, I felt cool air moving against my cheek. The sticky closeness of the cool-suit was gone and I was lying on my back in a bed. I opened my eyes and stared at the off-white ceiling, waiting for my eyes to focus.

“Well, I guess our intrepid wanderer is going to live a bit longer after all. We weren’t sure for a while there.” It was Jana’s voice, but I couldn’t see her. She wasn’t gloating. I thought she would; she’d won the bet. “I’ll be back to settle up with you when you’re more recovered, Mr. Whitley.

“How’d I get myself into this?” I asked myself. Oh yeah, I remember. It started with that argument we had in the rec room.

“Whitley, you know I can’t just let you leave. You have a contract with Petrochem to work here for a full year. You’ve been here less than three months.”

“You can’t be serious, Jana. This place is a dump! I have to share a room with two other guys, the chow tastes like freeze-dried dust, there’s no rec room…”

“Now hold it,” Jana interrupted, waggling a finger at me, “This is a perfectly usable rec room.”

“Oh, yeah,” I scoffed, with a sweep of my arm, “two card tables, a few board games and a jukebox. Where’s the foosball, Jana? Where’s the pool table? Where are the Vid games?”

“And you think Transtellar has those, is that it?”

“Hey, I know they do. I’ve been talking to the hopper jockeys. Transtellar not only has those, but a bowling alley, a real kitchen with canned food, and private rooms. All for the same one-year contract and higher pay scales to boot.”

“I can not, will not, let you out of your contract, Whitley. You can’t go. That’s it.”

She turned to leave, thinking she was going to have the last word in the matter. Since she was the base director, she should have but, me being the fool I am, I couldn’t accept that. “I’ll go anyway.”

She stopped dead in her tracks. Her back was to me but I knew she was rolling her eyes with that ‘God, will these kids ever grow up?’ look of hers. She turned around slowly, speaking in a slow monotone as she came.

“And how do you expect to get there? The trucks don’t have anywhere near that kind of range. The supply ship just left. Another won’t be here for two months. And even then the hoppers always land at Transtellar first, then here. You try to get to Transtellar via Earth and Petrochem will have you in jail the second you step off the transport.”

“I’ll walk if I have to, but I’ve had it with this place. I’m outta here.” I laced my fingers behind my head and leaned back in my chair, trying to look self-assured. Billy just peeked over his cards and kept quiet.

The beginnings of a smile cracked the rigid mask of Jana’s face. “Walk?”

“Yeah. It ain’t so far; ten, twelve hours should do it. I’ve been out there bustin rocks for six hours a day, five days a week for three months now. I’m used to it. I bet I could walk to Transtellar’s dome, no sweat.”

“Bet?” She just stood there a while, her mouth drawing into a pucker. Everyone knew of her penchant for wagering. “OK kid, I’ll take the bet; here’s the deal. I’ll give you a cool suit and a thirty minute head start. If you make it to Transtellar, I fill out the papers as “missing–presumed dead.” If my guys catch you, I get a two year contract from you, at your current pay scale, and no… more… griping. You game?”

I had to think about that. Two years in this place; could I stand that?

On the maps, Transtellar’s mining camp didn’t look very far from our own: we were working the same Iridium field, after all, but I wasn’t sure about the exact distance. I was young, with lots of stamina. But her security team did nothing but exercise in their time off; they were monsters. Probably not very smart though, or they wouldn’t have stayed here so long. I could outwit them easy.

“OK, it’s a deal.” We shook on it. “I’ll leave at dusk tonight.”

She smiled a smile that chilled my bones, “Good. Airlock four. Dusk, tonight.”

Sunset came awfully early that day. I spent the rest of the afternoon in my room. Bill was out on his shift, Jerry was just getting up. A few friends dropped by to offer their condolences and get dib’s on my stuff. Some friends.

Airlock four was the maintenance shed and, as usual, one of our huge trucks was spread all over the floor like some giant 3-D puzzle. I threaded my way through the clutter and rounded the front left tire. Two goons and Jana waited for me next to the airlock.

“We were beginning to worry about you, Whitley. It’s getting dark already. Better suit up fast if you want to make the most of the night.”

Her apes were already suited, visors up to conserve their bottled air, smoking cigars and chatting like this was some normal patrol assignment.

It took a little longer than usual to get dressed, I double checked every strap and joint to make sure it was right. I slung a couple of extra air tanks over my shoulder–the gorillas were taking extra, so could I–and walked out into the bay.

Jana started her timer from the moment they sealed the inner door of the personnel hatch. I had thirty minutes to get as far away from here as possible before they came after me.

Tracks would be easy to follow in the sand, so I’d have to stay in the rocky patches as much as possible. This would slow me down but make finding me harder because they’d provide cover I could hide in. They knew what general direction I’d be going, but they had to actually catch me to win the bet. The outer door swung open and I trotted off into the gathering darkness.

The sweat bands in my helmet were soon soaked. These cool-suits were made for equipment operators, not cross-country runners. Occasionally a droplet got past the band and stung my eye. I tried to blink it away and pressed on.

I hopped over a sandy runnel to the rocks on the other side and stepping-stoned my way into another cluster of boulders. Out of sight, I scrambled through to the other side. Dang: a wide stretch of cinnamon sand lay before me. Cut across and leave tracks, or go around and take five times as long?

I dropped my spare air tanks and climbed one of the shard-like boulders to have a look around. I stared out into the pink and black of Martian night for a long time. Nothing moved. I’d given them the slip.

Encouraged, I retrieved my tanks and trotted out into the loose sand.

~/ *_* \~

Dawn took me by surprise. With very little atmosphere, we don’t get the spectacular painted sky of an Earth sunrise; the sun just sort of slides up over the horizon. No fanfare.

The temp started rising right away. By the time the sun was straight overhead my A/C units were working at max capacity to keep up, and not quite making it. By now the apes would have turned back. They weren’t crazy enough to stay out in this heat so far from base. I changed my air tanks and left the empties lying in the sand; wouldn’t matter if anyone found them now. Transtellar had to be just over the next hill.

Except, it wasn’t.

~/ *_* \~

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath of sweet, fresh med-bay air.

The door banged open and a guy I didn’t recognize carried in a food tray. “Lunch time! Sit up and eat this before it gets cold. Bad enough when it’s hot, worse when it gets cold, but it’s all you’re gonna get.”

I sighed wistfully and said, “I almost made it, you know.”

“Made what?”

“What do you mean, ‘made what?’ Haven’t you heard? I’m the guy that tried to walk to Transtellar.”

My caretaker’s brows knitted and he looked at me as if I’d told him I had five eyes. “Almost walked to Transtellar? You are AT Transtellar.”

“What?” I choked, “I made it? But how… I passed out.”

“I heard one of our surveyors found some fool stumbling around out in a fringe area and brought him in. Must have been you. Lucky thing too or you’d be dead for sure.”

“Ha Haaaa! I won!” Then a thought hit me like a slap in the face, “That woman who was just here, how’d she get here?”

“Ground buggy.”

“Huh?”

“Yeah, she and our director visit each other pretty often. The buggies have a lot more speed and range than the heavy trucks. Rumor has it that they’re having an affair.” He winked.

“The bitch! She put me through this when all along… Oh, no matter, I’m here. I’m free. A bet is a bet.”

“Free? You came from Petrochem didn’t you?”

“Yeah, so?”

“I hear Petrochem’s an Eden compared to this dump; real food instead of this reconstituted crap, a racquetball court and everything.”

“No way. Petrochem’s a hole. At least you’ve got a decent rec room.”

“Rec room? All we’ve got is a reading room with a bunch of twenty year old paperbacks.”

“Private rooms?”

“Wards. Ten men to a ward.”

“Oh, God…”

“You been talking to a hopper jock haven’t you? I heard a rumor that Transtellar was offering them a hundred credits for each man they got to sign on when their Petrochem contracts were up. Guess it’s true.” He chuckled, ” Petrochem must be doing the same thing because they’re always talking about how much nicer it is over there; only three to a room, a card room, two days a week off… heaven.”

“I closed my eyes and flopped back into the pillow, “Take the tray away, I can’t eat that slop.”

The orderly just shrugged, picked up the tray, and left.

A while later Jana came back with some papers. “I have your disappearance report right here, once I sign it you’re free to stay here as long as you like. Just like I promised. Wanna see it?”

“No.” I was miserable. “Jana, please; take me back. Don’t leave me here.”

“Can’t do it, sport. We had a bet. You won. I don’t Welch.”

“Please! I’ll even sign the two year contract and say your goons caught me, just don’t leave me here. Please?”

She pinched her lips together and thought it over with a deep sigh. “All right, I’ll get the paperwork.”

She was back in just a few minutes with the two year contract, which I gladly signed. Then a doctor came in and prepared a hypodermic.

“What’s that for?”

“I understand you’re going back to Petrochem. That’s a long buggy ride and you’re in bad shape, son. You’ll be a lot more comfortable if I put you out for the trip.”

He jabbed the needle into my hip, I felt woozy right away. As waves of blissful euphoria swept over me I think I heard him say to Jana, “Think he bought it?”

“Oh yeah; hook, line, and sinker.”

“Good,” the medic chuckled, “I’ll have him moved down to his old room and he’ll never know…”

~/ *_* \~

Creepy Coincidence

When I came inside after all the yard work was done yesterday, I took off my hat and laid it next to the computer to post the results of our labors to Facebook. Normally I don’t do that. That is I don’t lay the hat by the computer, I post to Facebook quite a lot: it has become the defacto “keep-connected” avenue with almost all of my friends and relatives. Normally I leave the hat near the door so I remember to put it back on when I go out. It keeps my scalp from getting sunburnt and helps protect from flying insects and ticks. Most of our property is wooded, ticks like to drop on warm blooded things from the trees. A wide-brimmed hat also helps keep me dry in a light rain.

A Fedora is my hat of preference. I wear a brown oiled cotton Fedora most of the time, and a straw version for yard work in the hottest part of the summer. Not many people wear Fedora’s anymore, but I like this style best.

I opened up Facebook to post the final episode of our project and what popped up in the ad bar amazed me:

Now, understand that I have NOT been searching for or looking at hats, much less a new Fedora. If I had been, this would not be a coincidence but a programmed advertising ploy.

And I cannot say I’ve ever seen a hat come up in the ad bar before. Shoes and Tee shirts all the time, but not hats. Is it a wild coincidence that the one time I lay my hat next to the computer a hat very much like it comes up in the advertising results?

That’s just too spooky!