Josie’s Midnight Con

The dogtor is in

Josie Bean has taken it in her mind that if she gets me up anywhere between 2:00 am and 4:00 am and goes outside that I should give her a stick-treat. We are in the habit of giving stick-treats to good dogs who go outside after they get up so they are “safe” to let run loose in the house. But that is after We the People get up, not whenever they decide they need a snack. She’s trying to con me: and it’s not the first time.

Face of a con artist
Who can resist this face?

I’ve been getting up in the wee hours and letting her out (just to be safe), but I don’t give her a stick when she comes inside, just tell her, “Back to bed now”. Even if she does not need to go out she will wander around out there for a long time, leaving me to wait for her to come back. Once I’m fully awake, no matter what the hour, I’m awake and will not get back to sleep.

Last night when I shuffled down the hall at 4:00 am to let her out she bypassed the laundry room (where the door to ‘outside’ is) and headed for the kitchen, looking back over her shoulder, “Are you coming, come this way, the treats are this way.” It’s been raining. The grass is wet. She has no desire to get wet in order to con a treat out of me. She’s trying a more direct approach.

I told her, ”No … not going to happen.” and went back to bed. Normally I’d be getting up then but … I’m tired.

The past couple of nights, when she comes and bounces against my side of the bed way too early I reach over and scratch her head for a bit, but don’t get up. She has no legitimate “need”, and I need my sleep. Later, when she does need to go she’ll come in and nose-whistle at me. I check the time and get up if it’s in that 4:00 to 5:00 range that I normally get up anyway.

If she starts whistling at me earlier than that I’ll have to make a judgment call: risk being played or risk finding a puddle in the morning.

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